Finding our place and new “normal” may take a lot of introspection, energy and time. One thing I found is that it also involved re-creating my surroundings. Everyone handles loss differently—some find that by freezing their surroundings as they were when their loved one was with them is necessary to maintain some continuity. Others find that it’s important to create a new environment, surrounded by everything that is new.
Clearing my environment from lingering sadness and the energy of loss was important—not that it was easy, or even immediate, but for me necessary. I found that most of our “things” were too laden with old energy, and when I allowed myself to release some of my physical belongings, I was also able to release some of my pent-up feelings. Just as we are sometimes guilty of hoarding things, we can also be guilty of hoarding past emotions—ones that we’re not yet ready to bring out into the open, examine and process. Finding ways to release both old things and old emotions can be therapeutic as we navigate our way through grief.
Professional organizers use a system of “keep”, “donate”, and “throw away” when they work with clients to create a more organized space. Perhaps we can all take a lesson from their organizational skills and bring our stored emotions out and apply the same labels.
By sorting through some of our physical possessions and stored emotions, we can move toward creating a space where we feel surrounded by both the things we love and emotions we want to remember. May you feel some peace in finding the things and emotions that make you feel supported and surrounded by love.
Sharon Clark